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Where’s Caylee?

I don’t get to watch much TV and I really don’t mind.  My family pretty much runs that and in fact, CSI and Nancy Grace freak my daughter out, so it’s just as well.  I’ve been following the case of Casey and Caylee Anthony and I’m anxious as everyone, to see how this one turns out.  Here’s a post from a “true crime” website that I check now and then.  (Warning:  Site can be addictive and graphic in nature)  I do not recommend looking at it more than once a week!  The guy that runs the site has an extremely sarcastic sense of humor and a knack for the truth.  (see any correction in the comments below) Though there is nothing funny about the loss of a loved one, he uses his sarcasm in his journaling, so with all the eeeeews and OMG’s, expect to laugh.  That is, if you have a sense of humor……..

Caylee Anthony – Missing since early June

Caylee Marie Anthony on The Dreamin' Demon

Orlando, FL and The Dreamin’ Demon Home Office – As we all know too well, Casey Anthony got out of jail yesterday. And after three articles and a total of over forty bajillion comments, (okay, 7500, but who’s counting?) the Legend Of Peeperann’s Pizza Delivery really deserves a post all its own.   Yes, denizens, it was our very own Peeperann who sent Casey Anthony the welcome-home gift of pizza, “With love and decomp from the Dreamin’ Demon.” 

It started on a rainy Thursday morning – yesterday, even – when it became clear that yes, Casey Anthony was going home.  For those who have been living in a broom closet or under a large rock, Casey Anthony is the mother of missing child Caylee Anthony.  When human cadaver dogs alerted on Casey’s car trunk in July, Casey’s mother Cindy Anthony had become cranky with the press and their incessant rude questions. She told the media, the internet, and the world that the smell of human decomposition had been caused by Casey leaving a pizza in her car for twelve to nineteen days.  A Domino’s MeatZZa pizza, to be exact.  Of course, Cindy was wrong.  An Orlando news station experimented with the pizza and was unable to make it emit human cadaverine or putrescine, probably because Domino’s does not make pizza out of humans.  Further, it really didn’t stink that much.  So Cindy was either wrong or lying, and neither has been uncommon during this case. 

Our posters, and there are a lot of you, have felt very frustrated with the progress or lack thereof in Caylee’s disappearance.  Many, like our Peeperann, have spent hours researching the case and looking at it from all angles.  The sad conclusion that is virutally always reached is that Caylee is likely dead and that her mother Casey killed her.  The dysfunction, denial, and outright lies of Caylee’s family (and lately of Leonard Padilla, the bounty hunter who arranged Casey’s bail) have added to the frustration.  After three email exchanges with Leonard Padilla in which Padilla was quite rude to our Peeper, she was sad yesterday.  Knowing that Casey was getting out of jail on bond and would go home to do her nails and enjoy a beer and just hang out while Caylee remained missing left our Peeperann disgruntled and hmphy.  And she decided to do something about it. 

With the help and advice of several posters and at least one administrator (ahem, heh), Peeperann did it.  She called a Domino’s Pizza in Orlando and ordered Casey a medium-sized MeatZZa pizza.  On the lid, she ordered that a note be written, saying, “With love and decomp from the Dreamin’ Demon.”  Which was just damned funny, I don’t care who you are.  Because, after all, a pizza is not human decomposition, no matter how much Cindy Anthony wants it to be.   

The message was for Casey.  Not a threat, not a hateful gesture (okay, maybe a little bit hateful).  It was designed to let her and her cadre of professionals, none of whom are scouring the countryside for Caylee, know that we know the truth.  We are not fooled by visions of pepperoni dancing in our gullible little heads.  We do our homework.  We know the difference between cadaverine from a human and a baked sausage left out too long.  We, Casey Anthony, are not as stupid as your parents, as your bail guy, as the people who you think you have fooled.  We know what you did, and we want you to know we know.

Peeperann paid $14.37 for the pizza at around 11:00 a.m.  It arrived right on time – about ten minutes earlier than first expected, even – and the media had a field day.  People the internet over thought that the Anthonys were weird, even heartless, for ordering a pizza, and Peeper just smiled.  We laughed out loud and took credit for the event like we thought of it personally, and Peeperann was kind and gracious and said “I just want the site to get the credit”, like we’d ever let that happen.  By mid-afternoon, we’d made the news and a copycat had sent a Pizza Hut pie as well.  Which was nice, since a single medium pie was unlikely to feed all the bondspeople and security and whatnot.  But then Leonard Padilla told CNN’s Headline News that Casey’s brother Lee had sent the pie in an outright, bald-faced, bullshit lie.  We knew it was a lie, because we had Hector, the Domino’s manager, who had called Peeper’s phone to verify the message and the order.  We also had Peeper’s credit card transaction report for the order.  So Padilla was lying, and that in turn caused people posting on other sites to call us liars.

Now, we will do a lot of stuff.  We are irreverent, often adolescent, and certainly snarky.  But liars, kids, we are NOT.  We got mad.  Peeper got mad.  And we felt the need to set the record straight.  But just about the time we were really heating up and calling the networks in a fit of fury, Padilla tripped like an Olympic gymnast on a bad balance beam.  At five minutes to the close of Nancy Grace, Padilla said, “We just have to look 180 degrees and make sure that the pizza man is actually delivering a pizza that is ordered by the house and not by some kook that wrote, uh, you know, Stacy murder me.”

Granted, Padilla may well have been talking about the Pizza Hut copycat, who wrote “Casey murdered me” on that box.  (We thought ours was funnier.)  But what he did was tell the world that the Anthony family had not ordered pizza, was not ordering pizza, and that the pizza delivery had pissed them off a bit.   With that statement, we felt vindicated, knowing that the truth always comes out in the end – even if it slips out between Padilla’s teeth and a toothpick.

So that’s the true story of Peeperann and the Orlando Pizza.  We’ve heard that a local Orlando network wants to talk to her for a possible interview.  We couldn’t be prouder.  Public shaming – it’s what we do.  And nobody knows that better than our Peeperann and her glorious, excellent Prank of the MeatZZA Pizza.

  

Ohhh, we better put a disclaimer here: Don’t send the Anthonys a pizza.  Peeper did it once and it was funny – once.  Lots of pizzas are not so much funny as they are harassment.  Ditto sympathy cards, shovels, and all the other stuff that sounds hilarious but is in actuality not really all that legal.  Just be glad Peeper did it.  She speaks for all of us.

 

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